Ever have one of those moments where God reminds you just how blessed you are, and you are convicted for your selfishness, unthankfulness, etc...? That has been me recently. One sunny afternoon last week, Jason and Connor were playing outside, so I grabbed my camera and captured these shots.
Looking at them on the computer that night, the Holy Spirit brought to my attention how ungrateful I have been lately for my wonderful husband. I am alway thanking Him for the blessing of our son, but too often I neglect to remind myself (and Jason) how much he means to me, and how thankful I am for a Godly partner.
Too often, I find myself complaining that I don't get enough help (although I am always in the market for extra help), while ignoring all the things Jason does do for our family, the extra responsibilities he takes on at the radio station, at church, with the Y-Club, and the fact that he has actually started ironing his own clothes (most of the time).
Too often I find myself nagging him about my list of things to be done, when I know that he already knows what needs to be done and would probably be more likely to help without my "nudging."
Too often I ignore the sparkle in his eye when he sees our son each afternoon, and how Connor giggles in delight at each tickle, spin, or piggyback ride.
Too often I am in my own bubble of school, housework, and everyday life to remind him how much I respect and cherish him and our relationship.
Too often I mention what he doesn't do, instead of appreciating the planning and care he takes to make moments special, such as planning a weekly Christmas Movie Monday night, complete with a movie choice, theme, and goodies.
My husband is strong, intelligent, funny, spontaneous, driven, perfectionistic, and romantic (at heart, although I do miss the days of sweet Post-It notes on the mirror, hint, hint).
While Connor is a pretty great blend of the two of us, I can see the little mischevious sparkle in his eye sometimes that could only come from Jason, and I love it. I love that he has Jason's perfect lips and maniacal laugh.
These pictures reminded me that in spite of all of my complaints, wishes, hopes, and dreams for our marriage and for the future, I am pretty blessed right where I am today.
There is nothing more endearing than to see my husband in the role of father. It brings out the best in him: tenderness, compassion, humor, and reckless abandon for all the stresses of life.
It is then that I see the carefree Jason I met 11 years ago, fell for, and am still madly in love with today.
Sometimes I just need a reminder of just how blessed I am. At least for today, God, I get it.